Thursday, December 10, 2015

The Bathroom Battlefield

Not the wrong way, an alternate way!

I just posted a reply to a friend’s Facebook page regarding the “correct” way to load a roll of toilet paper in our favourite reading room aka the bathroom. Well, it seems it triggered a whole other wave of things that women are almost ready to go to war over and that is the seat should be down, the cover too, and the bathroom door should be closed at all times (the latter was in response to my comment regarding if you had pets, there is a better way to load a roll of toilet paper, so I feel there is no “correct” way to load it. Just make it easy to find and forget the folded dart for visitors. 

Have you ever seen a cat jump up and spin a doorknob to open a door? My brother had a cat like that. He could also open windows by pushing them up with his shoulders. The cat, not my brother.)

The basic problem regarding the household bathroom is it is designed by women for women and men are allowed to use it if they follow their rules. I honestly think the bathroom generally is poorly designed based on functionality which I think is more of a masculine wish than the “make it look pretty” feminine approach to many things. 

My design would include a toilet (for women mostly and men when the business requires that you sit down), bidet (men, it is not a drinking fountain), shower (to get clean), bathtub (for women to soak in to get away from their daily troubles—often the man in the household) and a urinal designed by men with a self-cleaning/closing device to keep it out of sight and smell of the visitors. The room itself would have compartments with separate doors to let more than one person use it at a time since it is probably the most needed room in the house after the kitchen.

And it would have all those display only things that women do for visitors like the soaps in trays and little towels that no one who lives in the house is allowed to use EVER except maybe if needed for first aid assistance for an accidental event that results in bleeding. Just make sure that individual is close to death, otherwise use the toilet paper if you can figure out if it was loaded “correctly”.

Ultimately, the best solution is really only available to those families that have an over-sized ego box for a home so they could do what all restaurants and businesses do already and that is separate rooms for men and women to do their biological business. But we know that will never happen because women insist on constantly redesigning the home that they pretty much made all the buying decisions on selecting the one of her choice. Mostly the man is only concerned about the fridge, garage, backyard and TV viewing room so the rest of the house is not a high priority for him.

But of course, this discussion never happens in any house between a husband and wife because the smart husband knows this is in the category of “Does this dress make me look fat”. The moral here is there is no way you can win in this discussion, so you find ways to get out of getting involved in that discussion.

Yes, I am single. It is easier on my blood pressure and doesn’t trigger anxiety attacks.